I look at my account status page, which is where I'm supposedly able to stop payments. It indicates that I'm a paid member with autopayments. I can buy automatic or manual payments, but I have no option to change the card or to halt payments. Help?
Boy has started third grade. It was a relief to finish second grade; the teacher was so rigid about behavioral expectations and even after he improved his behavior and his choices, she still looked constantly for infractions. She was a good teacher, but a total throwback to the "children should be seen and not heard" mentality. If she had kids, she'd probably make them sit still and study their catechism on Sundays.
Business is horribly busy. I am a basket case half the time from the stress. It will be such a relief when this month is over. October is already booked but not to the extent that Sept is. I need to hire someone who can do photography, listing, production, and maybe social media, but I am doubtful about finding someone with all those skills and I don't have time to train them anyway. I need to clone myself, only with less neuroses about photography.
I kind of forgot about LJ for a month or two while I was drowning in work. Hi!
Last Halloween, I bought the boy a Jedi robe for his costume. He fell in love with Lord of the Rings in Feb, particularly Gandalf. Now he wears the robe constantly--to the grocery store, out walking the dog, playing with friends, etc. He also carries a walking staff/wizard staff at every opportunity.
A few days ago, we were walking in the park, and two different groups of people commented on the robe. "Hey, I think Obi-Wan is following us." "Cool costume, are you Harry Hogwarts?" As we were walking away, boy said, "Everyone thinks that I'm wearing a costume, but they don't know that it's just my normal clothes."
There is a preschooler down the street who worships the boy. Whenever he goes by in the bike trailer, I hear him saying the boy's name excitedly. We were driving past his house, and saw him wearing a long playsilk tied around his neck (closest he could come to a cloak, I think) and carrying a stick. Just like boy--it was adorable.
I have some handspun Gotland (same fiber used to make the elven cloaks in the movies) and I promised to make boy a hooded cloak. Hope I have enough yarn.
I can never not work because I have a deeply-ingrained need to have my own money. I don't have any childhood baggage about it, so my best guess is that it says "independence" to me. I never feel trapped or not my own person when I have my own income.
That said, I feel more and more like a freeloader in my marriage, when logically my brain says I don't need to feel that way. I paid for a big percentage of our mutual life for the first four years of marriage (and prior to that), and more than my share for the next six. I never thought about it that way or held any sort of grudge or sense of superiority over it; it just happened to be the way things were.
The shoe has been on the other foot these last two years. I was okay with it the first year of full-time dyeing because I knew it would take some time to build the business.
But this year--I feel like if I'm going to work this hard and have the business gobble up the rest of my life, I ought to be making more. On the one hand, it's manual labor with a physical cap on what I can produce and a luxury product during a recession and what the hell did I expect? On the other hand, flexibility to hang out with my kid and getting out of the soul-killing mire that was my last job was absolutely worth it. And a big chunk of our mutual retirement funds are from me, plus I have a pension, so I'll be making up for my current lack of money in about 20 years, if not sooner.
I have been trying to do more of the housework and such as an attempt to make up for my drop in financial contribution to the health of the household, but let's face it, I am a sucky housekeeper. I can ensure clean clothes and clean dishes, and a healthy dinner at home 60%-75% of the time, but the clutter ...! I absolutely suck at picking up random crap because I never have a place to put it. If something has a home, I can get it there. If I need to decide what to do with it, forget it. It stays in a pile on the table.
We'll see how the rest of the year goes. This month was my biggest online sales month ever. Went 50% (!!) over my sales target, thanks to a confluence of factors--blog mentions, a kickass (if I say so myself) ad, podcasters. I think I'm getting to a certain critical mass now where, if I can keep up my volume of listings while not hurting my show inventory, I can start seeing some amazing results.
Something has to give, though. I'm starting to think about Plan B, which is good because it will always ensure that I've got enough satisfaction with what I'm doing to stay with it, instead of being trapped in a rut.
It's 4 a.m. and the only reason I'm not still reading this book is that my eyes are watering too much from tiredness. Run don't walk to the nearest copy and start reading. The review blurb says "a combination of Neal Stephenson and Philip Pullman" but that doesn't nearly cover it. This book is so smart yet so compelling, not a burden to read like you're trying to improve your mind. I hope the ending won't disappoint.
Her blog is pretty good too, from what I've seen. I liked her post on feminists. gwillowwilson.com, check it out, yo.
I've hit a milestone: grounding my kid for the first time, at age 7. He'd been playing with a friend a couple of doors down for a couple of hours, when he came home and said his friend's family was going for a walk in the park; could he take the dog? I said no, we had to leave soon to go pick up dinner. I said that an hour ago, that would've been fine, but now we had to leave.
Apparently the boy took that as meaning that the dog couldn't go, but he could. When he left, I thought it was to tell his friend that he couldn't go, but no, he left for the park. Really?? You thought that I had to take the DOG to get dinner?
When he finally showed up an hour later, I told him he was grounded--no playdates tomorrow. I've already cancelled the one that we'd set up, and he won't be allowed to play with anyone else, either.
I don't think I'm being unfair. Am I?